Appreciate Yourself

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loveletterto-selfToo many people look for appreciation and acknowledgement from others. Social media platforms such as facebook and twitter have provided avenues were people are fascinated by the number of likes or positive comments they receive on their posts. It must be noted that positive comments, praise and recognition are positive gestures and need to be encouraged.
The challenge for most of us is that we need confirmation from others as a pre-condition of self appreciation. Without the endorsement and validation from others, we feel unloved and unwanted.  We build a wall around us to keep others away even if they show us love. This happens because we constantly maximise our negative qualities and downplay the positive ones. Most of us do not even realise that we are unique beyond measure and we have amazing qualities that make us stand out from the rest.
We are always looking for perfection and because perfection is unattainable we find ourselves miserable and  frustrated. As Leo Tolstoy says, “if you look for perfection, you’ll never be content” .  We need to realise that it is perfectly fine to be imperfect. Learn to appreciate yourself for small things and your life will improve significantly.
1. Self appreciation is a sign of gratitude:
I believe that you cannot give something when you are not content with who you are. You cannot appreciate others if you fail to love and appreciate the person in the mirror. Be filled with self love and you will generate and vibrate love. Be tainted with positivity and you will rub if off others. Always remember the words of Marilyn Monroe when she said that “wanting to be someone else is the waste of the person that you are”.
2.  Change the story that you tell yourself
Many of us have been told that we would amount to nothing in life. Some of us have been told that we are not beautiful and we cannot be loved. Some of us have been told that we are not capable or deserving of a better life. The reaction by most of us is to internalise these stories and make them our own. We constantly replay this movie in our heads until it is our second nature irrespective of evidence to the contrary. We fail to take a moment and appreciate the good talents and qualities in us. Even if we are assured by people who love us and doing this coming from a good place,  we reject the feedback because we have learned to internalise the wrong story.  Listen to your inner voice because it is telling you the truth, you are special. We all have the internal navigation system that is always pointing us to true north,  however because we have not learned to appreciate who we are, we choose to ignore the signal.
3. Turn your previous mistakes into learnings
Constantly criticising yourself for your past mistakes is like trying to steer the car forward whilst your eyes are fixed on the rear view mirror. We all make mistakes however the ones who succeed are the people who take the lessons from the chapter of mishaps and turn them into future treasures. Do not turn your mistakes into self hate and self blame, rather use them as opportunities to challenge yourself to become the better person.
Self appreciation is not pride, it is not arrogance. It is acknowledging yourself for the simplest of decisions and actions you take. Appreciate yourself for finding your starter button. Recognise yourself for making your resolutions. Appreciate yourself for the good that you do to others.
As a take away, ask yourself the following questions and write your responses in your journal:

  • What are my unique qualities to celerate?
  • When last did I acknowledge myself for doing something positive for me?
  • How can I appreciate and acknowedge myself from time to time?

Tex Hlalele
Think Big, Dream Wild & Prosper
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Until next time……

One comment

  1. absolutely…. I am not only my best friend but my own keeper. after all, it is my life and i havr nothe outsourcede it to anyone. Thank you for getting us to always remember Tex.

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