Stop Asking For Permission For Your Life

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“Don’t look for society to give you permission to be yourself”

steve maraboli

Many of us are looking for freedom but it will remain elusive because we are looking to others to give us permission to be who we want to be. We take the easy route of following the crowd even if the path is leading nowhere. As a result, we remain trapped in our unpalatable situations because we are afraid of what others will say if we dare to be different.

We remain at the whim of others by succumbing to labelling. This happens when people characterise and classify others, using phrases that are meant to control. In our societies, families, work etc when you dare to stand out, people are quick to label you “clever” or they say you think you are “better”.

As mundane as it sounds, people have fallen prey and gave permission to others to control their thoughts, behaviour and actions. Because they are afraid to appear “clever” and “better” by others’ standards, they bury their aspirations six feet under ground.

You need to realise that the aim of labelling is to induce guilt so that you remain in the dark hole as everyone else. As an individual, you need to realise that those who want to label and control you can barely control themselves.

Why should you give someone control over your life while they do not have even a week’s plan for theirs?

The question is, why do you give your birthright to a meaningful life away?

Remove the nose from your life and learn from Mahatma Gandhi’s words when he said, “the only tyrant I accept in this world is the still voice within”

That voice is the true north that has given you permission to be who and what you were born to be.  

Tex Hlalele is a speaker, life and business coach. He is the author of the book, Face the person in the mirror. Book Tex to help you and your team gain insights and possibilities for individual learning and organisational advancement on +2764 656 6174 or visit


  1. Yes Tex its true as long as one does not understand who he/she is, you remain stuck in fear and uncertainty because you not focused on yourself but listening to people who do not know you.
    I agree that labelling has to do with control. Remember the soccer players, we gave them nicknames so to control their behaviour in the field of play. It can be negative or positive depending on what people want to do with you.
    Thank you for the insight

    1. It is true Tledima, we should always be alert of other people’s negative motives and remain true to ourselves

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